Michelle Martin

Cake for breakfast

Thursday, January 25, 2018

Teresa turned 8 years old this month.

There’s nothing particularly remarkable about that; I’d bet that nearly everybody reading this turned 8 years old some time ago.

But it’s the first time she has been 8, and she’s testing it out, trying to get a feeling for what this new situation means. She started the week before her birthday, when she informed me that if anyone asked her age, she was just going to say she was 8, because she had to get used to the idea.

This year, she celebrated with a party at home with several friends. They ate pizza and cake, made paper bag puppets and played Twister and bingo. Everyone got prizes from the games, and everyone took home a little goody bag. I think everyone had a good time.

Teresa had fun, although at times it was hard for her to remember that her guests were just that — guests — and we had to make sure they felt included. Sometimes, she said, it felt like the party was more about them than her, especially when they started suggesting games.

We congratulated her, because that’s how you know you’ve thrown a good party. 

This isn’t the first at-home birthday party we’ve had, not even the first one we’ve had for Teresa. They seem to go in cycles: we have a party at home, which reminds us that it costs money as well as time to plan, prepare, execute and clean up; then we host a party somewhere else, at one of the many businesses that will host children’s parties, and are reminded that those cost even more money, and it often feels like the birthday child is just one among the guests; and then some years we forgo a party and just celebrate with family.

As much as I complain about doing them (and I do complain), I think I like the at-home parties the best. I get to see and get to know the kids’ friends better, and they get to come to our house and play with their things. The guests learn how to be guests in someone else’s home, and the host learns about hospitality, instead of everyone just being treated like a customer.

We do have one tradition that doesn’t change from year to year: When it’s someone’s birthday, everyone in the house gets cake for breakfast. Sometimes it’s homemade, sometimes we buy it, but it’s there on the actual birthday date, not the next convenient weekend. Everyone gets up before school or work, and we light the birthday candles and sing and open cards and, for the kids, presents from Mom and Dad.

Because however you do it, birthdays are worth celebrating. It’s worth it to remember that God gave you the gift of your life at the same time he made a gift of you to your family. It’s worth it to take a moment to taste the sweetness of life, to blow out the candles and to look forward to another year. 

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