July 6: 14th Sunday of Ordinary Time

Employ vulnerability

Is 66:10-14c; Ps 66:1-3, 4-5, 6-7, 16, 20; Gal 6:14-18; Lk 10:1-12, 17-20

What aspect of your life — what relationship, behavior, memory, etc. — do you feel the most self-conscious about? Who knows that about you, if anyone? Can you imagine how you would feel if it ever became public knowledge?

There are few things in life that we shy away from more than our vulnerability. “Never let them see you sweat,” as the saying goes. Ever since Adam and Eve first knew they were naked (Gn 3:7) and donned their fig leaves, it seems we have struggled to let others know our weaknesses, insecurities and fears. And there is good reason for that.

It would be wonderful if every person who learned our vulnerabilities graciously offered to help us overcome them. But of course, the reality is that most of us have had the painful experience of having our weaknesses exploited and manipulated by others. We know what it feels like to have been shamed, rejected or defeated on account of having let others come too close to our hearts.

After such experiences, we tend to jealously guard our hearts and avoid any possible exchanges that might expose us to similar pain. Once bitten, twice shy.

And yet, deep down, we seem to know that this doesn’t really help in the long term. In his masterful reflection on the human heart, “The Four Loves,”
C.S. Lewis observes that we do have the option of locking our heart away tightly in an interior box to avoid any intimate interactions with others, foolishly thinking that we can secure it from ever being hurt or broken. But such a choice, he warns, only produces a heart that ultimately petrifies into hardened stone, unable to give or receive love at all.

Apparently, God has read C. S. Lewis. Because throughout the Bible, key figures are often called upon to expose their weaknesses or sacrifice what they most dearly want to protect.

Adam and Eve want to hide in their shame, so God calls them out into the open to face it. Jeremiah is constantly sent by God to deliver unpopular messages to people who receive him with anger and resentment, leaving him threatened and despairing. Jesus calls Zacchaeus, safely hiding amongst the branches of his sycamore tree, to come down and be exposed to the very crowd he was seeking to avoid. The list goes on.

Given this trend, Jesus’ instructions to the 72 disciples in today’s Gospel are particularly noteworthy. He not only sends them on a difficult mission, but he deliberately forces them to be highly vulnerable as they undertake it. As if to underscore the point, he refers to them as lambs being sent among wolves — they are being intentionally sent toward potential slaughter.

Furthermore, he deprives them of any security blanket or backup resources: no money, no bag, no sandals. In short, if they are to survive this mission, they will only do so by relying on the support of the people they encounter. The vulnerability that Jesus sends them with has the ability to either shut them down in defensiveness and self-preservation or to open them up to greater receptivity.

But they do not go empty handed. What they carry is Jesus’ peace, as well as all of the teaching and love he has shared with them during their time together. Most notably, they have witnessed how he himself did not hide his vulnerability, but allowed himself to openly preach about the kingdom of God, even in the face of hostility and rejection.

In “The Soul of Shame,” author Curt Thompson refers to vulnerability as the “remedy for shame.” If we are willing to allow ourselves to be known, not in spite of, but directly through our weaknesses, then we can begin to receive the help and love of others. This evokes Paul’s saying: “When I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Cor 12:10).

Of course, such action requires judgment and prudence, but sometimes the most vulnerable thing we can do is to reach out to a friend or counselor and admit we need help.

Jesus doesn’t shun vulnerability; he encourages his disciples to employ it to grow closer to him. We should take that as permission to do likewise.